GuyTalk: Dealing with Losing Your Man to Football

Photo via Namooh

It’s that time again…time for football, and a little GuyTalk. One of our GuyTalk columnists, Aji Olayemi, is a self-proclaimed renaissance man, born and raised in Chicago, with a knack for knowing his way around town. And around a game of football! Aside from freelance writing, Aji enjoys pursuing rare vinyls, taking the scenic route to catch up on reading, and gettin’ down to early R&B hits. But this month, he’s not talking smooth beats or the Windy City. He’s giving us the best ways to win at losing our guys to football season…

Photo via Keyword Suggestions

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL?!

No, not really? Well too bad, because it’s fast approaching with no signs of slowing down. There are lots of men and women at both ends of the spectrum when it comes to football. From my perspective women tend to be better at compartmentalizing their football fandom and not letting it consume the rest of their lives.

Photo via Video and Audio Center

However, during my turbulent career as the manager/owner/coach of a fantasy football team I’ve learned that it doesn’t take long to become emotionally invested. All at once your team becomes a source of pride, pain, frustration, contempt and joy. With this kind of emotional capital invested, combined with a ceaseless stream of information about injuries, contract disputes, locker room fights and the alto infrequent sex scandal, it’s hard not to be consumed by football. And let’s not forget about the ultimate test of the male attention span that is NFL Sunday; ten seemingly continuous hours of football with only enough spare time to use the bathroom and order more food.

I can genuinely empathize with the football-phobic about the loss of their significant others during this most harrowing of seasons. But there are strategies to be employed to get you through it and maybe even turn it into a season that you enjoy as well.

Photo via Tampa Bay

IF YOU CAN’T BEAT ‘EM, JOIN ‘EM

Give football a try, you just might like it. Just asking questions is an easy way to start. Football is a complicated a sport. Trying to understand all the positions, the rules and the general objective of the game can be a daunting task for the unfamiliar. So go ahead ask your guy! Who better to learn from than the person seemingly going back to school for his PH. D in the west coast offense? Being engaged and inquisitive during a football game is one way to stay connected. Plus, once you’ve figured out how it works you may turn into a die-hard football fan yourself…or not.

FREE YOURSELF

Conversely, if you’ve seen what football has to offer and are not impressed then consider this season as your opportunity for self-exploration. Use the extra time to try things you wouldn’t normally do. In that time, you might stumble upon something to obsess over the way we dudes obsess about football.

Photo via Real Property Management

STRIKE A DEAL

Although I’m mentioning this tactic last, it’s probably the first technique you should employ on you quest to survive the football season. And that tactic is compromise. As I’ve said before, men are reasonable people (for the most part). So asking us to lay off the football talk at dinner or skip a few of those 10-hour Sunday watchathons isn’t too much to ask. But don’t even try to tear us away from the playoffs.

Go Bears!